The Code Of Conduct
Aug 19th, 2010 by Carolyn Resnick Method
To understand the Waterhole Rituals and how the pecking order of horses function in a way that brings about the well-being of the herd, even to support the weakest individual, we need to look at the conditions that exist in nature that create herd behavior.
For horses to survive in nature, they need to stay in a herd. What prevents horses from beating up on each other is the need to stay together for their safety, as well as the open spaces that they live in, which give them freedom to choose who stays in the herd, and who goes. If a horse is too self-serving and aggressive, the herd has the ability to banish them. Likewise, a horse can only join a herd when they show they can fit in harmoniously.
I have never cared for referring to the pecking order of horses. I prefer to call it picking order. One of the main reasons family bands get established is a stallion’s need to win the favor of a mare so that she will go off and form a new band with him. In the beginning of a relationship, as these bands are being formed, the stallion must put forth his best behavior. These groups or bands grow through horses’ respect and consideration for each other, and their need to develop a strong bond.
For a group to stay together, they must court each other on a daily basis. It is in the nature of horses to adjust their attitude through the bonding rituals. These adjustments take care of horses becoming too aggressive or self-serving. As the bond between individuals grows, there is always an adjustment of rude behavior that resurfaces from time to time in the relationships they share.
As you are going along with the Waterhole Rituals, resetting the respect and engaging in bonding interactions with your horse is essential for a deepening of the relationship.
In fact, horses enjoy the dynamic shifts that occur from these adjustments. If we think about it, in our own marriages and relationships, we have occasional breaks of “nice” and arguments, and that’s what gives spice to the relationship. It is what creates the bond to grow deeper and the magnetic connection to flourish, both in horses and humans.
So, don’t be disappointed when you need to make these adjustments. If you think about it, we like these adjustments within our own friendships. It’s what brings spice to a marriage, if we care more for the outcome to be heartfelt.
The weekend is here. I want to remind everyone to watch out for New Horse and Human Sightings. I had one, just last week: Apollo, my dog, ran up the hill and grabbed some sort of dead carcass. He usually will not give it up, and I have to pry his mouth open and also worry about getting bit, so he can keep his find. This time, as he was standing at least twenty feet away from me, I asked him to spit it out, and he did!
Also, don’t forget Robin’s clinic on September 4-5, in Sebastopol, CA, just north of San Francisco, very close to Santa Rosa.
For more information on the clinic, you can click here http://www.carolynresnickblog.com/new-liberty-training-clinic/
Or visit my Facebook page.
Carolyn
PS Insider Circle and In a Box people – look out for an email over the weekend regarding the extension training I promised you called:
Beyond the Waterhole Rituals: WRIC Clinic
No related posts.
I apologise for getting into personal conversations on your website, Carolyn, but Frank’s latest post raised an interesting possibility and this is the only way I know to contact him.
Frank, did you by any chance mean Halo Farm (in Ocala, Florida)? If so, I am only minutes away and would be delighted to play the carrot game with you and your horse.
Hi Candle,
It’s Hala Arabian Farms, in Lake City, Columbia County. Nothing fancy, just a pretty ordinary boarding place. But I sure appreciate your offer! I think a bike will come close to solving it for me! Time will tell! Thanks again!
Hi Carolyn,
I like Frank have not been able to find anyone to play the carrot game with me so I devised my own carrot game and I must say I am getting in better shape myself. The game goes like this: I have 2 stallion yearlings that I play with one being the black stallion I had to stand up to when starting the WHR. I begin by placing carrots around the perimeter of the paddock then go into the paddock at the far end I then call them to me ,they come trotting towards me I say good boys and come trot….. I then tell them to stay ……… I run to another corner get a carrot and call them to me again….. sometimes I say come trot with me and we find the carrot together. Now my grandson who is 2 1/2 can play with me. I have taught them to stop about a ft. away from him then they slowly walk to him to get the carrot .He has been doing the WHR with me for the entire time I have a picture of him sharing territory with my 1yr old filly.
New horse sighting; while walking to the paddock from the barn with my daughter and her 2 boys the 2 yr old and her new baby in his pram, my filly would walk beside the 2yr old and when he would pause she would put her head on top of his, when the baby would cry shiloh would put her head into the pram and breath on him this was quite something. I love this connection thank you for teaching and sharing all of your wisdom and knowledge. Namaste Sherry
Sherry,
Thanks so much for the carrot game tips! If you can do it with your very young grand children, surely I, at 71, should not have too many problems. Providing I “walk” versus “run”. Gitano is in an enclosure of approximately 4 acres. For this time of year, I think he would enjoy this in the shady portion of his paddock. Just getting back from where he boards so this will go on things to do for tomorrow. Thanks again!
Ha ha Frank, I share your preference to walk not run!! you could find a bike maybe? Or learn power walking
I suddenly remembered seeing, some years ago, a local ‘senior’ shepherd who was riding a motor scooter around in the fields shepherding his sheep, up and down those Tuscan hills too!
Susan,
The bike idea is a gem! I’ll be on the lookout for a serviceable used one as the ground at Hala Farms is not tabletop flat; it comes with bumps and lumps! And wild watermelons!
Scooters for sheep herding is one thing I can live with. But helicopters to “gather” wild horse herds makes my skin crawl!
Thanks for the good tip!
Thanks Sherry!
Dear Carolyn,
Checking in and enjoying reading the Blog and applying the information.
Toni
Hello Carolyn, and everyone,
I echo the sentiment that this topic is one that should be aired as frequently and as widely as possible! Idem your comment to Andrea (14) about how we need to ensure that the unnatural way in which most horses are grouped and kept means we have a responsibility to make sure herd rules are adhered to where we can. I recall your saying on one of the recent Insider Circle calls, that in the situation where a youngster is bullying an oldster the youngster should be sent packing (by the human) each time s/he tries to bully, until s/he has learned the rules about respect and harmony and the oldster has gained the confidence to continue the education of the youngster.
Regarding the general topic of ‘pecking order’ and how the original observation slowly became hardened into a false ‘truth’ (sic!) – I would like to contribute titles of two books I have read recently which discuss this very deeply and very much support Carolyn’s observations …. one is ‘Adam’s Task: Calling Animals by Name’ by Vicki Hearne and Donald McCaig (2007); the other is ‘Inside your horse’s mind. A study of equine intelligence and human prejudice’ (1999) by Lesley Skipper – this is now sadly out of print but if you hunt around you can find it second-hand on amazon and elsewhere.
I don’t see how proper and consistent practice of the Waterhole Rituals could fail to bring about a conscious change in people’s behaviour in general (as others have mentioned on this same blog topic) – and for the better.
best wishes,
Susan (IC, Italy)
checking in
Dear Carolyn,
My favorite sentence in this blog post is this one:
“As you are going along with the Waterhole Rituals, resetting the respect and engaging in bonding interactions with your horse is essential for a deepening of the relationship.”
This I know to be true from my own experience this summer. I have found this simple truth to be extraordinarily liberating. It tells me that when things go wrong, or the bond feels lost or badly strained, or when I feel as if I just cannot get anywhere with my horse, the bond CAN and WILL recover.
Often, just sharing time and space is enough. Sometimes, playing games, or leading from behind, or more eye contact will “reset” the connection, and it’s as if all the mistakes are forgiven and forgotten.
Turn your focus away from the problem , and remember why you love your horse, and do the things you both like to do. Like magic, the bond returns, deeper and stronger than before.
It works on husbands too. At least, sometimes!
Bonnie
Beautiful sentence, Bonnie: “Turn your focus away from the problem and remember WHY YOU LOVE YOUR HORSE…”
Thank you for reminding us this.
Greetings
Andrea
hi carolyn,
your blog seems to be in syink with my every need !!!! every time i have a quirey ,the answer is there just like magic …..i had some reajusting to do today ,with my 3yr old ,who was quite in my face from the start , but after sending him away several times before he got the message,i was wondering if i was doing the right thing !!!!! and bingo ,your blog is answering again ……i would not mention this nomaly but this is happening lots …loving it…… cant thank you enough for your love and insight….i am saving up to join a coaching prgram……..shine on …..
Catching up on all the post and enjoying catching up on the videos of Marlyn. Renee
Thank you Carolyn for this Code of Conduct.
Quote: If a horse is too self-serving and aggressive, the herd has the ability to banish them. Likewise, a horse can only join a herd when they show they can fit in harmoniously.Unquote
I have the feeling that sometimes there also are people acting too self-serving and aggressive who then feel unpleasantly surprised when they are being ‘banished from the herd’.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the ‘unpleasantly-surprised-ones’ could realize the effects of their behaviour and then decide to try and fit in harmoniously again in a heartfelt way.
Perhaps this is a Human Sighting??
Wishing you all a good weekend, Geerteke
OOPS! I meant “context”, not “contest”, obviously.
Sorry.
Andrea
Hello Carolyn,
in this contest I’d like to share something I could observe lately in the place my mare Clarence lives. Something that upsets me, but as it’s not my place I only can express my opinion and hope it’ll be heard:
There is an old horse (25 years), which was divided from his 19-year-old buddy, and put together in a big paddock with two young females ( one is only a couple of years old). These two mares are very connected (the older one “adopted” the younger one) and at feeding times,even before they get the hay, they begin to chase the old guy – especially the younger one kicks him and gets very angry. I told the barn-owner it’d be better to divide them, at least while eating. Now she does, but her answer was: “That’s the destiny of old animals. Also in a natural herd they’d be chased.”
I thought, this answer was quite irresponsable and it upset me:
1. I think we have to assure our domestic horses in a way that they need not fight for their food
2. I remember you telling us in the WRIC somewhere that we must absolutley not permit a young horse to beat up an old one
So my question is how would this conflict be resolved in a herd of wild horses. I don’t think the leaders would permit such behaviour of young horses towards old ones, because, as you say above, also to the weakest individual safety and well-being is assured in a herd.
My best.
Andrea
Dear Andrea,
It is been my believe from what I have witnessed that when there is aggressive behavior is that some balance in nature is out of balance. I have seen more horses taking care to keep the community safe than the other.
When we put horses together it is our responsibility to manage them in a humane way. To not take care of an old horse’s well being it is not humane even if the conditions in nature would not be there for this old horse.
It is our obligation to bring well being to the horses in our care.
You might check with the human society and see if there is something they can do. There might be a law that provides of this old horse’s well being.
Thank you, Carolyn, for your answer. I will see, what I can do to change the situation, and try to convince the owner of the place to find an appropriate way to give this horse the well-being, he deserves. It’s an old Dressage-horse, and it cuts my heart to watch how his owner doesn’t care.
Andrea
For what it is worth, I think there must be significant differences between herd dynamics among wild horses as described by you and other observers, and herd dynamics in horses who were born domesticated and always kept in an environment subject to constant domination by people. Probably the biggest difference is that my horses are not affected, much less governed, by any scarcity of resources.
My horses (mares, geldings, a few mother-son and mother-daughter pairs)live together in a large field (60 plus acres) of excellent pasture with three separate water sources and ample shade. They are together in that field all the time except for coming into stalls twice a day for brief intervals when they are fed, showered, fly sprayed, etc. and also during bad weather.
While some horses plainly are dominent over others in the herd, they almost never interact with each other using the rituals in any form I can detect. There are distinct pairings of buddies that are pretty constant, and a couple of on-again-off-again sub-herds of three or four, but usually they graze, mutually groom and doze in the shade with their buddies or by themselves without exhibiting any “leading from behind” or “taking territory.” There does not appear to be much, or even any, strife or contention among them, even briefly, other than the more dominent horses pinning ears at the less dominent ones and driving them away with a bad look or a swing of the butt in their direction when everyone rushes to the gate a mealtime or to greet me when I go visit the pasture. Even on the rare occasion when I introduce a new horse into the herd, their interactions do not seem to conform to recognizable variations of the waterhole rituals as I understand them.
Nevertheless, every horse I have taken out of the herd to play with has responded to my application of the waterhole rituals pretty much as you describe, making allowances for my imperfect understanding of how to apply appropriate cues in different circumstances. In some cases (the more damaged horses especially), just sharing territory and saying hello, then walking away, has caused dramatic changes very quickly to the way they behave in other aspect of my interaction with them. To a horse, they are more friendly and affectionate and somehow softer. This really is interesting. Obviously something about the Rituals is hard-wired into their brains, even though I have almost never, in hundreds or maybe even thousands of hours of observation, seen them use the rituals among themselves.
Dear Candle,
The reason you are not seeing this in your herd is that none of them are breaking the code of conduct.
I am surprised about the new horses that are put into the herd not going though some of the Rituals.
You have a great balance of individuals and environment.
As I think more about introducing new herd members, perhaps my assertion that they did not go through any recognizable Rituals is wrong. The most recent new influx was two years ago, long before I knew anything about your waterhole rituals. It is quite possible that I simply did not recognize the behaviors for what they were. Certainly when I put three two year olds into the herd, the merger involved little conflict and mostly just a few minutes of big-time galloping around. Then the old herd and the new kids went their separate ways and kept apart for many weeks until, gradually, the groups quietly melded. The three two year olds were already close friends, having lived together most of their lives. The dams of two of them were herd members. Before putting them together, I put the youngsters into a smallish paddock that shared a fence line with the herd for about a week, and brought the kids into the big barn for daily meals with the others. Everyone had a good chance to get used to seeing and touching each other before they were actually free together. When the youngsters got turned out in the big field with the herd, I don’t recall anything other than a short period of galloping around in which everyone from the old herd joined in chasing the kids around until they all settled down started grazing. But it is perfectly possible — since I did not know the rituals then — that I did not notice (and do not now recall) the rituals being applied.
Dear Carolyn
I love reading your blog and have so enjoyed everything we have all been through with the insider circle class. I am also looking forward to the follow up clinic. I have spent this week with my ex racehorse (Fi Fi) on loading. Each day I sit in the trailer with her feed on my lap and moved slightly back each time. On the third day she had two feet in the trailer and hind feet on the ramp, I let her eat all her food bar one mouthful and moved her out. My daughter asked if she could try it with our 3 yr old cob who had not been in a trailer since arriving two years ago. She popped his head collar on led him to the trailer and he went straight in!! I closed the back, he ate his food and then came out the front without a care in the world. (Fi Fi was very vocal during this time and clearly not impressed with this young upstart eating her food in her trailer) Guess what? The next day when I put Fi Fi’s feed in the trailer she went straight in – all the way!!
Thank you for the lesson of taking things slow and going with the moment. Have a nice weekend.
Carolyn B
“Pecking order” was a name given for rank organisation into a hierarchy. Behaviourists first described it by watching chickens interacting in a natural situation, which is why it was called ‘peck order’.
Zoologically speaking, all animals that live in groups have an hierarchical organisation to keep order in the group. All the group members require the same resources from the environment, so they are all competing for the same things.
At the same time, the group gives them security. Some can sleep while others keep watch for predators or encroaching groups of the same species (who also need the same resources).
A hierarchy is an organisation from most dominant or ‘lead’ animal to the most submissive at the bottom. In times of food shortage (summer drought and longer than average winter with more than average snow) the more dominant critters will have the advantage, as they can ‘claim the spot’ from others below them in the hierarchy.
It’s pretty harsh out there in the real world. The oldest and youngest and injured will succumb first. The offspring of the more dominant individuals will have nutritional advantage.
The desire to rise in the hierarchy is hard-wired into horses (and other group animals). Some desire it more strongly than others. Some want to lead and others are happy to follow a trusted leader.
People live in groups and form hierarchies all the time.
I love learning about and watching horse dynamics. It is interesting that you speak of marriage and relationships within this post. I continue to notice since your class that what I am learning extends into so many things and back again to my relationship with my horse. A relationship is a give and take and a shaping. In my case, Yowahtee and I are both continuously being shaped in a very alive conversation. Each conversation is as fascinating as the next and it seems there is a magnet between him and I, even when I am away from the barn because I feel the pull to be back there conversing with him.
One funny story I experienced happened a few weeks ago when my husband and I took our son to college. Both of them are very tall and they walk fast and I often find myself following them, or so I thought. I started to feel abit annoyed about it, but then I thought of ‘leading from behind’ and our discussions in class and my work with Yowahtee. I found myself nearly giggling with delight at the similarities and perhaps became a new human sighting myself as I looked at my experience in this new light.
I am intently watching my emails for the ‘Beyond the Waterhole Rituals: WRIC Clinic’…would be so wonderful to continue learning with you!
Hi Carolyn,
“resetting the respect and engaging in bonding interactions” is important for me to keep in mind now Juno’s again in the clinic with a brandnew leg wound (after the last one finally healed after 7 weeks!).
I’m so easily persuaded by her to spoil her enormously with treats and scratches during the little time I get to spend with her. But her courting me can turn very fast into demanding!
best wishes!
Carolyn or Mark,
Will the WRIC 2010 Instructional Videos that are currently posted on the website be available for purchase? I’d love to be able to refer back to them.
Thanks to both of you for the great work you do!
Steph
Thanks for clarifying the need to make adjustments from time to time with your horse. Thanks especially for afirming the opinion that minor conflicts between horse and human are natural and they are okay!
I have a very dominant little welsh pony and I’ve felt for some time that need to change some things(maybe give him some boundaries!), but I felt bad about adjusting. Yesterday, I finally decided to go for it and well it took some persistance, but in the end there was more harmony.
Thank you Carolyn, I always find these natural herd dynamics very interesting, because they’re the foundation we’re working with.
Some time ago I was working with Saegola and at one point I thought I had to make an adjustment to let Saegola know she wasn’t allowed to go to the hay on her own without my permission, but it turned out to be a New Horse Sighting!
!
We were companion walking in the arena at quite some distance from the haypile. Suddenly Saegola left me and trotted off with only one thought in her mind: ‘I want that hay!’ I couldn’t prevent her from going to the hay at that moment or outrun her to be there first, so I just let her go, but called her name anyway. Halfway she stopped in her tracks, stood still for a moment, looked at the hay, then turned her head to look at me. I could almost hear her grey cells ‘crunch’. Then she turned around, came back to me and we reconnected! It was a great moment, Saegola acted almost humanly, thinking over her options and then deciding what to do.
Ofcourse I companion walked her straight to the hay
Dear Marja,
Thank you for sharing. I call this a new horse sighting.
Very interesting Carolyn!
I will be experiencing some big changes with my 2 boys, as we are moving to our new property next week, then 2 new boys will be arriving a week or so later.
I have 2 paddocks adjoining my house, so I can keep them close while they adjust & settle in to their new surroundings. And the 2 ‘pairs’ can comfort & support each other as they get to know the other.
It will be a whole new dynamic for all of us & a very exciting time. I will keep my video camera handy so I can record some of the action.
Whinneys,
Moyna & Da Boyz
Carolyn
Isn’t it interesting how a little word change (pick for peck) can change the whole concept of a sentence? You are a person who uses the positive, not the negative.
Have a great weekend.
At the risk of coming across as “dumb”, I need an explination of “New Horse and Human Sightings”, and “The Go Away Activity”. Thank you.
Hi Frank, Carolyn clarified the ‘New Horse sighting’ to me recently, you can find it here
.
Thank you, Marja. Will have to check it later – on the way to an appointment. Do you have any similar info on the “Go Away” activity?
Sorry Frank, I don’t know what you mean…
Marja,
“Go Away” is sending your horse away “then come back”. How is this accomplished? It may be related to the WHR. But I can’t be certain as it seems I missed that blog. Is this any help to you?
Dear Frank,
Welcome. I can tell you are not a regular reader from the questions you are asking. The “go away activity” is to develop a gas pedal, safty and to gain respect.
There is alot written on this subject. If you go to the top of the page on the right is a search button you could use.
In Sharing Territory Ritual which is one of my Rituals if your horse is not willing to leave you while your are sitting down reading a book you would drive him out of your space until he would not come back to you. That is one activity. What it does is create a better connection and a horse that would have more desire to bond and be more polite. The other one is the carrot game when your drive the horse away to a friend and when he goes to that friend he gets a carrot. This helps the horse to take direction, seek direction, see the value in taking direction as well as to develop a driving aid and gas pedal that is very specific to the energy you would like the horse to respond to. The carrot game creates more respect that can lead to exuberance at liberty dancing if you so choose to have a horse will lots of gusto. It helps a dressage horse to perform in self carriage with out the need for a whip or spur when you ride. All the exercises I share are meant to translated to the saddle if you have the basic skill to connect well with your horse. The Rituals should help you to connect well with your horse though your practice of them so you will have the basic skill you will need from your ability to create a true partnership with them for the ground.
Hope this is of help,
Carolyn
Hi Carolyn,
Very true – I am not a regular reader. But I thank you for stepping in with your guidance.
My horse will stand down(out of my space) but it takes a few requests to get him there! I have never been quite sure what makes him want to be close to me: mutual protection, or treats in my pocket. Being from a wild herd, with him it’s about half-and-half according to what I can observe.
Of course, this is not the same as go away. For the carrot game, I cannot “enlist” anyone at the boarding facility to help out. The folks there assume he is still “wild” – kicks, bites, charges. But Gitano doesn’t do these things. I don’t see any real problem as domesticated horses display similar behavior. None the less, the carrot game is difficult to accomplish with out some help.
I could just lay the carror down opposite of where I may be; then send him away; see what happens.
I have a copy”Naked Liberty” and the “WRIC DVD, Training Videos – Highlights from Program 1″.
This is a very useful post for me. I often feel, when I have to make an “adjustment” with my very well socialized, well behaved horse, that I must have failed to earn or keep his respect. This reminds me that all relationships are fluid, and that just because he needs reminding of our ‘picking order’ once in a while, doesn’t mean that the whole relationship has fallen apart!
Dear Carolyn,
thanks, great post. I like the “picking” order variation!!! I’ve never liked the pecking order theories, and you just explained to me why.
Pecking order comes from chickens, anyway, doesn’t it? How do you peck without a beak? Unless, you take the figurative meaning of criticizing. Just looked it up in the dictionary:
( peck at) criticize or nag : defects for a critic to peck at.
Horses don’t nag, and they hate to be nagged. So pecking order for horses is just a human construct. Anyway, very interesting.
Happy weekend,
Christian