Secrets That You Need to Know About Horses

Why do I teach horse training in the same manner that horses communicate and train one another?

Photo by Mena Canonico

The Hello Ritual

It makes sense to connect with them using the social rituals that are natural to horses because they respond more easily to being trained. These rituals create friendships, respect and a deeper ability to follow the leader. The first thing you need to know about training a horse is how to make a connection that fits the horse’s personality and then that your leadership is understood by the horse. Working with a horse in a social manner helps him to be comfortable. When you communicate with him the way horses train horses, you have a direct line to reaching him in the most natural way possible, which opens the door to having a horse that would want to be trained and follow your lead. Training a horse by using the rituals that horses use develops your leadership approach to fit the individual horse’s nature and his changing attitude. A horse can be willing and the next moment, he can be resistant and then bored or excited, distracted, aggressive, and can turn shy in an instant.

When learning horsemanship, I believe the biggest hurdle to face is knowing when to lead and when to follow a horse’s wishes. People often freeze when a horse becomes resistant or bored and then they allow the horse to take advantage of them. They are afraid to face a horse with stronger leadership when it is called for and this is where the natural order is lost. It is about understanding when not to back down to maintain your leadership position. There is an art to being strong and inviting at the same time, and when you do this, it will not hurt the bond, it will help it. This is what I teach to horse people in my School and I believe it is the secret to the art of horsemanship. When this is understood, all areas of your life will work better for you as well.

What you may not know is that I have more up my sleeve than training horses and running a horsemanship school.

I want to make a difference by creating more empathy and peace of mind through how to communicate in order to create better interpersonal relationships. I want to help people learn how to not let life take advantage of them through teaching a kind of communication that will create interconnectedness and help the bond you share with others to grow. Though communication, you can create more harmony in the world, as well as create a love for community and a kind of belonging that will create more humanitarians. When a person is in a state of being in love with life and has a great sense of self, he will be more willing to take care of the needs of others. In this state of being, a person’s leadership becomes effective, inviting and magnetic.

We can raise the vibrations of the people through the way we choose to communicate with them. With just that alone, another soul is nourished.

We play all kinds of roles with each other to support one another’s needs. However, I believe that there needs to be a shift of perception with respect to our roles as leaders. I first noticed this when I was a child in the school system and at that time, I made a vow to myself to show the world how it can be different. School needs to be a community that helps and supports the student with compassion and leadership that is inviting. All relationships need to have these elements within them.

http://education.more4kids.info

http://education.more4kids.info

I did not like how I was treated in school. I had to do what I was told and I had no rights except that no one was allowed to lay a hand on me, although I was still hit by the principal, teachers, and bullies. I had no rights except for bathroom privileges. I do not think a child should be made to sit down in a chair most of the day and pay attention. If a child resisted sitting in a chair, he or she was considered to have a medical condition – attention deficit disorder. I called it being a child. Children want to play, not sit. It seemed to me that learning should come from empowering the student through better communication and empathy, and by offering interesting activities that develop work habits and interconnectedness.

If a child does not get good grades, he is generally shamed. If he does not like a subject, that’s too bad. It is not the fault of the program, but the fault of the student for not trying hard enough. I opt for no-fault insurance and the right to pick freedom and consideration. The ideal program is one that creates a sense of self and a love of community, and one that lures the student to want to learn. The way we are taught, we lose all sorts of dignity and do not have the chance to develop a great sense of respect for ourselves or for our classmates.

Everything is a competition when it could be working with interconnectedness.

So what are these kids going to grow into? One thing I know is that they are going to ride herd on themselves all of their lives for not measuring up to an invisible yardstick they set for themselves. They may not get to the point of feeling good enough to know how to help others and how to bring the world into a higher vibration.

Jazz and ApolloIt is my belief that the training of horses in a free open environment for the purpose of developing interconnectedness brings a sense of well-being to the soul and evolves you to have more desire to love yourself, as well as more ability to lead and support others. Learning how to connect and lead from the heart can bring fulfillment and abundance to each day. Horses can teach us how to lead in the moment when others would be willing to follow, how to communicate and how to love in a way that grows respect and well being in both parties.

There is a sacred geometry that horses follow to create partnerships with one another; this helps them to form a one-minded connection that then leads to a unified, loving herd. This way of evolving relationships can help mankind.

Learning how to connect with and train a horse through communicating with them in their own language and using their system can give humans a philosophy of life to live by that can help to heal the planet while healing themselves.

Learning how to keep the connection and magnetism alive in a relationship with a horse in a natural setting opens a door for people to know how to make better connections in their own human world.

The secret to personal empowerment lies in knowing how to respect the personal space of others, how to use flexible boundaries to keep your self-respect, and how to grow the bond through the influence of your communication.

Horses have influenced man’s spiritual understanding of the world for thousands of years.

I predict that horses will have an even greater impact on the world by creating a new consciousness that will increase man’s ability to care for the planet and his own kind. As I see it, looking at the culture of horses can help us to see a universal wholeness and loving interconnectedness that can change the way we perceive life, our role in it and how it plays out.

What I have learned from horses is that that they know when the individual needs to put the community over his own needs and when the community needs to put the individual’s needs first. They just know because they share interconnectedness; we as humans do not have that ability because we do not feel all-powerful or have a deep sense of belonging and a love for all living things.

Man has always evolved to a higher consciousness through history. I can see horses helping man to reach his next stage of development, as they teach us how to grow our ability to connect with one another though better communication as leaders, teachers partners and friends. I believe that we have stepped away from caring about our relationships with one another because of our competitive attitudes and discomfort with ourselves.

My Waterhole Rituals can create a symbiotic trust and forever loyalty with a horse.

Learning this skill helps us to know how to communicate better in our human lives. There is a time to pause, a time to act, a time to support, a time to lead, a time to follow, a time to speak and a time to listen; all this, we can learn from horses.

Losing sight of the sacred geometry in how to connect and communicate is pretty normal for humans. But once you have learned to lead horses the way they want to be led, you see that you have a formula of communication that works with all living things, which will give you this sense of belonging I spoke about earlier. This will allow you to make changes in the world and create a higher vibration within yourself and others. Once you have danced with a horse to win the right to lead him and the bond is deeper than you knew was possible, life will have new meaning.

Life becomes experiments of the heart.

You can see your role and the opportunity to raise the consciousness of man, and you create more harmony around you.

Once a horse has brought your spirit alive by experiencing a spontaneous dance created from your leadership communication, you become inspired to want to make a difference in the world from what you truly enjoy doing. Money will never replace a need for fulfillment or sense for belonging. Learning how to develop this dance with a horse will open you to yourself. Your reason and purpose for being alive will be clearer. In this clarity, you may find your calling or discover a deeper meaning to what you already enjoy doing that creates your fulfillment.

It is my theory that if everyone were to follow their calling, the world of man would find a universal wholeness and loving interconnectedness that would support the web of life and all living creatures great and small. Horses can open the door to loving all things when the walls come down and the dance has no more importance than to dance with a horse where the bond is deeply shared between you. The meaning of life emerges from the dance and I get to watch people heal and I get to make a difference in the world from what horses have taught me about compassion, care-taking leadership and the love of community.

I would love to have this blog kick off some engaging conversation on any point of interest you might have, including the deeper meaning of the horse and human connection.

Be on the lookout for more horse and human sightings and may the horse be with you.

Warmly,  

Carolyn


For those of you interested, here is another childhood story:

handsI remember having a family gathering at my grandmother’s house when I was a child. I was going to meet my great great grandmother. That day, all my Grandmothers on my father’s side were there – from my great, great grandmother to my great grandmother to my grandmother. I was told that this was a very important time for me because it was rare that a person gets to meet their great, great grandmother and to have all their grandmothers alive.

They also told me that the wisest woman in our family was my great, great grandmother, that each successive generation was the next wisest, and that all of the women in our family were very wise. I was told that as you age, you acquire more wisdom. However, I did not really understand this until now. I can see that with every year that passes, I acquire more wisdom, as well as more ability to endure and to support others from the heart like my grandmother did for me.

My mother did not share very much with me about her growing up years on a farm in Idaho where they grew potatoes. It was a farm that was self-sustaining; they grew all their vegetables, raised their meat and had dairy cows. They made everything they ate from scratch, except flour and sugar.

beesI did learn something about her experiences on their farm when we lived on my horse ranch in Sonoma, many years ago. One day, I walked outside to see two big black moving clouds taking on many shapes. I thought it was black birds or swallows. I went and got my mother to see these black clouds in the sky. She said that they were bees. I became concerned and she said there was nothing to be scared of. She told me that they were relocating their hive and that in Idaho, they wanted the bees to relocate on their farm, adding that if you got a large pan and beat it with a spoon, it would bring the bees to land somewhere around us. So as soon as I knew I did not need to be concerned, I ran into the house and got a pan and spoon and started beating it. Sure enough, it brought the bees down out of the sky to land on a hollow oak tree that was about 40 feet from where we were standing.

The tree was right where we parked our cars. It took them just a couple of hours to move into the tree. They stayed there for about 15 years or more and never bit anyone that came to the ranch. Many times I would visit them to feel their energy and meditate with them. I would watch them leave the hive and fly far away across the meadow. I would also try to spot them flying back home. It was a good feeling to watch my skill for spotting them increase. Keeping company with the bees increased my life experience by my curiosity about them. They kept the wonder of life alive in me, and kept me young and on my toes.

Share the love!
Aline Mellema/ IC/ Angel and Vicky/ Netherlands/ ECspring2011/ ICfall2011/ BTWRCmarch2012 - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

Thank you for this beautiful blog. It’s so inspiring!
Your words encourage me to be who I am, to follow my heart and to embrace life to its fullest.

I’m really happy to read that your mom is singing. That must be the most beautiful sound to listen to. Hope her feet will be better soon so she can enjoy walking again.

Much love,
Aline

Tamara Blits - a couple of years ago

My son Jeff, has a horse, he bought, for his
wife. this horse hates everything. Jeff says , she will kill anyone who gets near her. He thinks she is crazy, with mental problems. He has spent a lot of money on her, trying to fix her problems, but nothing works. I don’t like what they tell me, Snotty is her name, and she is crazy. He has her with a trainer, that will win, or lose this battle. I just wish this pretty Palomino Ovarian Paint, would calm down. I can’t fix their problem . I sure hope this trainer can. She is a beautiful horse. They don’t even want to listen to me. I wish they would stop trying to make her something she doesn’t want to be. I wish for her to feel free. This horse needs to be a baby, she was thrown into the world to fast. I think she is just 3 yrs. old.

    Tamara Blits - a couple of years ago

    People can be so good to horses, or they can be so bad, I wish everyone had a heart, especially for the babies, They need lots of love. Like you said ; Carolyn not everyone can see, what needs to be.

joanna blake - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn, your words in this post are so powerful, i’ve taken a few days to think about a response! a few weeks ago something shifted in me and i was able to approach your method from a leadership perspective and can-do attitude and boy have things changed quickly! My concerns about risking breaking the bond etc etc had nothing to do with my horse. i realise it was my fear of risking making mistakes, fear of ‘what if it goes wrong’.

when i finally got over this my horse said a big “I recognize you now, and we can have much more fun”!! She relates differently to me and it really is magic, like you say – i buzz all day the next day after we dance. i work with her in a 6 acre field where she really could run from me if she wants and the treat is the grass as these are the forbidden fields. however, when she eats she chooses to keep the eye contact ritual up. it’s like the rituals practice themselves! she also asks me if she can eat when we halt, and waits for the “and eat” from me, and i could be 50 feet away. the spookiness has gone when I long rein her to the fields she trots out boldly passing cars within 2inches, no hesitation what so ever.

it is like good schooling for humans too, as you say. to offer space rather than confinement, fun and energy rather than restriction and order to have authentic communication both ways. Your method has opened up a different path and I am so thankful and truly believe that it already has changed lives and had a ripple effect on those lives around us. may the dance continue!

Thank you for keeping us updated on Paulina’s progress and the tales are fantastic – i particularly like the image of her riding on the back of the motorbike – what a woman, what guts!!

all my love,
Joanna

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Joanna,

    This reminds me of a story. Years ago, I was giving a clinic in Enumclaw, Washington at Bryan Smith’s ranch. Someone brought a horse that they wanted me to fix. The situation was that no one could put a saddle on this horse. They had the horse in training with various experts and had failed. They told me that I too would fail. But maybe there was a hope there for them, cause there they were, attending my clinic. So of hearing this tale, I said, let’s take her out to the 5-acre field. I set the saddle in front of her nose and from standing in front of her, I threw the saddle on her back and she did not object. I had her owner do the same thing. The mare was fine with the saddle.

    So we addressed two things. We gave her the freedom that she needed and the approach we used works better for horses by bringing the saddle from the nose to the back rather than from the side to the back. We just find a different horse when we go out in a free environment and as long as we don’t have agenda, magic happens, as it did for me that day.

    Many times, horses don’t need training. We just need to have the right approach. These people contacted me several months later – never had problems saddling her again.

    Thanks for sharing.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

      linda salinas - a couple of years ago

      Dearest Carolyn,

      I loved reading this story. More and more I am realizing so much is just in the approach. I am printing this out and will share at the upcoming clinic.

      I love this blog as I love you,

      Linda

Anna-Karin Hägglund EC 2010 2011/ BTWHR 2012 / Russian Basjkir Ameri Kahn - a couple of years ago

Hi Carolyn!

The word are so lovely put out in this blog. I say AMEN to everyone of them!

Warmly,

Anna-Karin

Francis - a couple of years ago

Today I reread this wonderfull blog and it really made me think about the human communication part.
“There is an art to being strong and inviting at the same time, and when you do this, it will not hurt the bond, it will help it.”
This opened my eyes to what I’m looking for with my teenage son at the moment. He’s so hard to communicate with at the moment and I can get so frustrated about that sometimes…
But this blog helped me realise that I have to find that combination between strong and inviting with him, just as I’m looking for that in the communication with my horse. And like with horses… for every individual you will have to find the perfect balance for that particular individual. For some you have to be stronger, for other, more timid individuals, you have to be more inviting. It’s that perfect balance that makes it work and it’s such a thin line…
It’s the search for that perfect balance and the experience to find it as soon as you interact with that individual, what I’m hoping to accomplish one day. It’s a long road but it helped me realise what I’m looking for, not only with my horse, but also with the communication with other humans (and my son in particular 😉 )
Thank you for that insight, sure wish I was in the position to join the upcoming course to learn more.

It’s also so good to read about your mother singing by the way… So wonderfull you are still able to take care of her at your place and keep her happy.

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Francis,

    That’s what makes life beautiful – the challenges we face in our personal relationships with family members that we have a deep heart connection with. I have noticed that when people come to my ranch, many times they are better at knowing how to handle a horse they do not know than they are setting rules for the horses they love. Just like with my dog. I’m a mess! But as he gets older, I find out that no matter how bad a parent I’ve been, he has turned into an amazing soul and I think when I look back on it, I didn’t need to worry so much or feel guilty that I didn’t give him enough personal coaching.

    Thank you for sharing.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

      Francis - a couple of years ago

      Thank you Carolyn, you’re words are encouraging.
      I’m a single mom, raising him alone since he was 8 and we always lived quite secluded. I often felt (and feel) guilty and worry if I’m a good enough parent… Since a year we live in a somewhat larger village and he found a bunch of friends his age, going out, enjoying being 17 (18 next week, boy does that make me feel old! *grin*) And now he’s obviously catching up on puberty.
      But all and all I think haven’t done a really bad job raising him, at heart he’s a sweet boy and I get to hear that from others quite often as well.
      I think you are right… we study horse-behavour, do our best to understand what our horse is telling us and try to communicate in the best possible way. We know all about horses and how to handle them and what to do… but at home we take the community with our family somewhat ‘for granted’ maybe or think because we are the same ‘species’ it will go naturally. But I think we have to find that same balance talking to human individuals, like we try to find with our horse. Thank you for making me realise that.

Tyra Esterly - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and thought-provoking article.
I love this quote, “There is an art to being strong and inviting at the same time, and when you do this, it will not hurt the bond, it will help it. This is what I teach to horse people in my School and I believe it is the secret to the art of horsemanship. When this is understood, all areas of your life will work better for you as well.” I appreciate your insights about how greatly our connection with horses can be applied to our daily living.

Also, what you said about medical conditions. It is a risqué stand to take in our world today, but it is one I applaud you in. Children learn through play and discovery.

My mother raised us the way she did because she did not want us to experience this kind of learning environment. Our days of learning were made up of whatever captured our interest that particular day. If it was bugs, we spent the day in the forest collecting every sort of insect we could find. She would have us find out what each bug’s home was and what it did. If we were interested in frogs, we put on boots and shorts and caught some, or raised a tank full from eggs. This sort of learning, which was a great shock to many other mothers, instilled in my siblings and I a love and passion for learning new things, and gave my mom the experience she never had when she was a child. Supporting us in this way helped re-instill that passion for learning that was nearly wrung from her at an early age.

Horses are mesmerizing creatures. Their breathtaking beauty and bewitching air make them living illustrations. Allowing horses to illustrate the deeper meanings of life and the more illusive points so often lost in today’s culture allow you to share something (like what you just shared in this article) that people may otherwise find too difficult to grasp.

Sincerely,
Tyra Esterly

P.S. I am incredibly honored that you took the time to get to know me better this evening. Initially I was overwhelmed and quite star-struck that you called me. Thankfully, your gentle questions and easy manner of conversation quickly took me from feeling like a fish out of water, with my mouth gaping for air, and coaxed me back into reality.

Christina Ring - a couple of years ago

I was suprised but very happy to read about children´s education in your blog. Its is so true what you say about school, and I am an advocate for unschooling and free learning. And it is so true, how can we educate our horses at liberty, differently, without violence and with lots of asking, and then we push our CHILDREN into a sistem of fear and repression, of confined classrooms and no choice. Of course there are schools and schools, and hoem learning is not for everybodys lifestyle. I can just encourage every family out there – give it a try. It is so worth it. You see horses and children thrive when you give them chance to have an opinion and to learn at their own pace.

    GiselaBorawski-Hayes - a couple of years ago

    Christina,

    I homeschool, too, and there is definitely a philosophy in both homeschooling our children and liberty training with our horses. I use the Charlotte Mason method along with Unschooling with my daughter. I use the Carolyn Resnick method along with liberty with my Thoroughbred. Growth, whether in education or relationship with people or animals, only comes from openness and the opportunity for the other to pursue further their relationship with us. We should not force education down our children for it causes the opposite result. They end up dreading education. Same with horses, you should not force training down our horses. Of course, we can MAKE them, but whenever has that brought forth the magic in life, learning, and relationships.

      Angela Frey - a couple of years ago

      Yay, a train of thought and action that makes my soul sing out! Oh Joy, Oh Joy!!! I also homeschool my son and have found the lessons I have learned from understanding and applying Carolyns Method with my horses have changed my life on every level…It is a doorway to real spiritual development, not one that is based on high ideals and a faraway dream but one that is immediate and real. It is the dance of souls communicating in the harmony that only open realtionship and trust can bring…I am writing my story to share and I just want to add here a thank you to all the people and horses that seek this awareness in their hearts because you are the creators of a new and spectacular future for all of mankind! We are replanting the tree of Life, we are nurturing the begining of a wonderful world experience…I feel that people like Carolyn are aspects of perfect awareness gifted to us through their desire to be connected and open to Life…How privilidged are we!!!

        Carolyn Resnick
        Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

        Dear Angela,

        We are so lucky that people still understand this message of the heart. People could get so involved with their own personal gain and well-being that empathy for others could be overlooked. I believe that animal lovers play a great part in bringing forward the empathy of mankind. The situation here is that animal lovers tend to separate themselves from humanity and my little part is to develop the animal lover to open their heart to making change in the world and overlook the crimes of man. That’s when things will really happen.

        Warmly,
        Carolyn

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Christina,

    Thank you for checking in and sharing your feelings about the betterment of the school system for learning. I watched for years horsemen training horses and I felt I was at the end of that rope or that rider was on my back. I saw no difference in what they were doing to the horse as what they did to me when I was in school. This is what spurred me to make it impossible that the theory of leadership could not be brought forward when working a horse at liberty when one of the rules is: If your horse leaves you, you must quit what you’re doing and leave him alone until the connection returns and the horse is open to learning again.

    Christina, I agree with you. It’s all about our responsibility for developing a thriving atmosphere in our relationships with one another.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

Lynn - a couple of years ago

Hi Carolyn,

There is a sentence in your blog that speaks to me…

“But once you have learned to lead horses the way they want to be led, you see that you have a formula of communication…”

The golden rule is defined as “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” So maybe that should now be called the silver rule; and the new golden rule is, “treat others as they want to be treated.”

You’re always inspiring.

Thank you,
Lynn Punturiere

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Lynn,
    Yes, the “Golden rule'” is a step in the right directions but “What is good for the goose is not always good for the gander”.

    Carolyn

Lila Harding "Horse Coach" - a couple of years ago

Yes Yes YES!!! Thank you dear Carolyn for your love of life, the dance of nature and the interconnectedness of all things.

Warmly,
Lila & Sebastian

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Lila and Sebastian,

    I know one of these days you’re doing to drop by and visit!

    Thank you for checking in.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

karin kozlowski, EC, West Virginia, Roscoe and Amigo - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

Thank you so very much for this wonderful blog. There is so much to quote from this blog. I liked what you said about dancing with a horse to “win the right to lead him” and that life will have a new meaning. Also, “Once a horse has brought your spirit alive by experiencing a spontaneous dance created from your leadership communication, you become inspired to want to make a difference in the world from what you truly enjoy doing. Money will never replace a need for fulfillment. Your reason and purpose for being alive will be clearer.” This has been my transformation as a result of following your method with my horses. It has brought out the real me that has been in hiding for so many years. I finally am comfortable in being myself.

Your comment about how children are educated and that “Everything is a competition when it could be working with interconnectedness” and how kids grow up to “ride herd on themselves all of their lives for not measuring up to an invisible yardstick” explains why adults so often are unable to work and live together successfully in harmony. And this statement blew me away: “THEY MAY NOT GET TO THE POINT OF FEELING GOOD ENOUGH TO KNOW HOW TO HELP OTHERS AND HOW TO BRING THE WORLD INTO A HIGHER VIBRATION.” It’s so very true. One has to be at peace with oneself before one can be caring and compassionate. Otherwise one is self-absorbed with negative feelings and insecurity.

In a book I am reading by Anthony de Mello (Awareness), he talks about competition and that it can be “cruel if it is built on hatred of oneself and of others. People get a good feeling on the basis of somebody getting a bad feeling.” He recounts a story that an American doctor told about when he attended medical school in Switzerland. He said that a fair number of Americans attended the school. He said that some of the students were shocked that there were no grades, awards, dean’s list, or no first or last in the class. You either passed or you didn’t. He says that some students were too uncomfortable with this set up. I imagine those people who got their self-worth primarily from having a method to compare and rate themselves against others were dissatisfied. BUT something interesting happened in this setting to those that remained. “Those who survived suddenly discovered a strange thing they had never noticed at American universities: students, brilliant ones, helping others…” The American doctor’s son also attended medical school, but in the United States. His son told him that in the lab, students would often tamper with the microscope so that it would take three or four extra minutes to readjust it. This was the level of competition that existed.

This has to be the longest comment that I have ever made on your blog, Carolyn. In the past, I have just said that you and your method have influenced me greatly and let it go at that. But this time, I have to say more. Thank you for Brene Brown’s video. I recently purchased her book, Daring Greatly, in which she talks about vulnerability at great length and how we are afraid to be vulnerable and reveal our true selves because we are ashamed that we are not enough, not good enough and therefore do not want others to see what we believe are our weaknesses and shortcomings.

This actually ties in with what I want to relate to you about my experience with my horse Roscoe and working with your beautiful method and your philosophy of life. When I purchased Roscoe five years ago, we had a great deal of difficulty together. Things had gone from bad to worse until I discovered you. I was experiencing a great deal of frustration and even anger when working with him. I would catch myself getting so upset that the blood would rush to my face as a result of my negative feelings. I was shocked at myself because it wasn’t even that anyone was around watching me bumble around and “fail.” I was the only one watching myself. Yet I felt helpless and like a failure. In time I came to realize that most of my adult life has been spent feeling like I was not good enough. Well, all this began to change through building this wonderful relationship with Roscoe and Amigo with the WHRs. You encourage experimentation and trial and error as well as letting a relationship evolve and that it is alright to make mistakes. I have become comfortable with this process, even embrace it. (Of course, this translates to everything else in life as well.) This has taken the pressure off to succeed. My entire outlook and attitude has changed. And it comes as no surprise that my relationship with Roscoe changed and my relationships with people.

Thank you, Carolyn,

Karin

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Karin,

    I will always remember when you came and took my course here at the ranch. I so enjoyed getting to know you. You were a joy to work with.

    Thank you for offering this incredible comment and taking the time to write all the points that you wanted to share. Never hesitate to continue writing in depth about the things that you are focused on. I know all the readers read the comments as much as they do the blog, and when we share our experiences, it enriches the next day in our personal lives.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

amanda savill - a couple of years ago

Amanda (IC and EC 2011)

Dear Carolyn

I have been thinking about you a lot today after reading your most incredible blog late last night. You have wisdom etched into your bones. All day I have been remembering ‘interconnectedness’, no separation – it seems to be reverberating through me

Thank you for writing about you and Paulina and for the utube. It reminds me of loved ones and of the gifts that come with loving and taking care of our elders – moments of heartbreaking tenderness.

I am still marvelling and smiling at all that you expressed in that blog – seems worthy of a better name than ‘blog’ – something more like testament!

Thanks to you my horse, Zeph, and me keep going deeper and happier together.

with love,
amanda

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Amanda,

    I am so happy you enjoyed my blog. I enjoyed writing it. I do hope that what I write about will shift people’s viewpoints to the heart connections that they have with all living things. And I do believe we need to be more interested in coming together as a community to support our elders because community is what has the most power to care for them.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

SharolynWandzura - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,
So many quotes from your writing are hitting home this week…
And this is the one that floats in my mind the most:
“There is an art to being strong and inviting at the same time, and when you do this, it will not hurt the bond, it will help it.” Brilliant ~ I look forward to continuing the journey of exploring this art.
warmly,
Sharolyn

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Lover’s quarrels make the heart grow fonder. Again, it boils down to being authentic – even with your horse. Horses are extremely willing to accept you for who you are, then they forgive quickly, just like a dog. It’s our job to see when we have over-stepped our leadership approach and this is where most mistakes are made that are never seen.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

Wilma (IC fall 2011) - a couple of years ago

Hi Carolyn
I am a caregiver too with my mother. She had a health crisis 2 weeks ago and I thought she was done, yet here she is back home. I wish you the best times with your mother in the days you have with her. I will look forward to your blog, no matter how often it comes! :)
We brought my foal home yesterday – trailered her with her mother, loose, and then mom went back home in the trailer. Rose took it all quite well. She has a good feeling of security with me, and I will do my best to bring her along. She will be 6 months this week. Her mother was my horse for 10 years, but I sold her to a place where I thought she would be happy. She had the foal there. This is the only foal I have played with, but I have had a few weanlings/yearlings.
I was thinking about your reply to me in last week’s blog about foals. You suggested I make a DVD of my method to share with the world.
I will confess that I have been thinking, well, Carolyn didn’t really mean that, and I don’t have any method really. :) My mind shuffled it off as a bit of a dream, not real.
Today I am thinking, well, maybe Carolyn did mean it.
I don’t really have a method that I could break down. I think I could make a DVD story about “Ways of being with horses” or “Ways of influencing horses” using the group of horses I have. Each horse wants a different way, and each moment is different.
With Rose I have 7 now. This is too many, but it is a very interesting herd.
Some need to find other homes. Besides Rose the weanling, there are 2 minis coming 2, an arab type Eddie coming 3, Spinner a paint coming 4, my mini mare trained to drive, coming 5, and my old guy who is not enjoying his life anymore.
The only thing I need to make this DVD story is a tripod for the camera.
Best wishes for you and your mother
Wilma

MaryGayeLeBoeuf - a couple of years ago

Carolyn

Your message resounds with all of the wonderful things I have learned since beginning the Waterhole Rituals 15 months ago. Your message of leadership, community and value of the self and others, first came to me in Naked Liberty. The community of Indio where everyone had their own special place and were valued for their contributions, no matter where on the continum that contribution was found. Differences were recognized and celebrated. Every individual’s contribution had worth to all. The community strived and succeeded as a whole. How impossible this world would be if we all had exactly the same skills, knowledge and intuitions. Lots of somethings would get done, but lots of other things would be overlooked and neglected. A situation that would doom any society. As they did in Indio when you grew up, we must celebrate each individual and value ourselves based on what we do best. Instead, what has happened is that the need to make workers suited for the age of industrialization in the early 17th century, has turned into a system of education that seeks to punish the differences and create one-size-fits-all humans with one purpose: making money. Prior to the 17th century, children were not forced to sit confined in a small room to learn math, english, science, history. It was not natural to expect such things of children. Nor is it natural now. Then, when they were old enough, if they had a special aptitude they were apprenticed to a master, where they could learn their craft. While conditions were not always optimal, the idea is that individuals must be allowed to do what they excel in, not be forced into a preformed, preconceived existence based on the needs of industrialized society. We have the knowledge and the means to do that in today’s society, and we need to back away from the industrialized education, and recognize the value of children who were not made just to do math, science, english and history. While we need to teach children the basics of “reading, riting and rithmatic” as they begin their education, we must giver greater support and encouragement to the children who are our inventors, our craftsmen, our chefs, our designers, our artists, our dancers, our singers and horse-trainers. Celebrate and support diversity, not homogeny.

The wonder of it all, is that you have discovered, in the world of horses and the language of the herd, the framework and the building blocks to improve human communication and understanding both of horses and humans. The structure, behaviors and conventions of the herd present us with the optimal system for human existence and understanding. Creating and following leaders who are best suited to lead in wisdom and understanding – not those that can best bully others around. In WHR liberty, leaders who are bullys, will find themselves without anyone to lead. Instead you teach us to be leaders who seek to understand those whom they lead and look out for the best interests of all. Leaders who are kind yet who know that leadership also involves firmness and appropriate discipline. Without discipline where it is needed, leadership is lost and the good of the individual and the whole herd is compromised. But also, when discipline that is too harsh, it discredits leadership, and again harms the individual being disciplined and entire herd. Then there are the lessons to be learned about how each member of the herd has value to the whole. From Mustano and Moonlight leaders, down to the Sagebrush ambassadors, everyone in the herd has value. And everyone in the herd respects and follows their leaders, knowing that those leaders are fair and have everyone’s best interest in mind. How wonderful it would be if we humans felt that way about our leaders.
Carolyn, the journey of self-discovery I began 15 months ago with the WHR has changed my life in so many ways. I have learned so much about myself, my fears, and insecurities. I have also learned to conquer those fears, over come the insecurities and learn how to be a leader! Something I was never taught in school! In fact, like many, my early school years taught me many negative things about myself. Things that were completely untrue! The WHR have helped me to see my true potential in taking control of my destiny by recognizing how to be a leader, how to relate to and communicate with those I seek to lead and to other leaders. Learning flexible boundaries has helped me to become a caretaking leader, without out feeling the need to be aggressive or demeaning to those I seek to lead. I am certain as I continue this journey I will continue to discover things about myself, my horses, my family, friends and society, that will improve my life and the lives of those around me, horses and humans. Hopefully, like a pebble in a pond, the lessons I have learned from the WHR, will continue to expand and improve the lives of many others.
Love MaryGaye

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear MaryGaye,

    Thank you for your letter. I want you to know that your letter is definitely not at all too long. I want all my readers to write as long a letter as they would like.

    It would be nice if we could also look at my blog as a possible shared journal on higher consciousness. It would bring us closer. The lessons that we share with each other are so fascinating and I believe would get more education done than a how-to book.

    Your letter got me to thinking about exactly how education took place in the past. I do remember my mother went to school in a classroom that held all grades and the older students taught the younger students. It was a family type atmosphere in a church. So, the church doubled for a classroom. There were no more than maybe 15 students. When she told me this story, it was like I was there and even though I would have to sit down in a chair all day, I could see that I would enjoy the family environment.

    If anyone else wants to share any stories about kids’ education, I’d like to read about it!

    Thank you, MaryGaye and thank you for the great testimony.
    All my love,
    Carolyn

stina - a couple of years ago

Thank you,

Thea Fast - a couple of years ago

Lovely synchronicity! I just rewrote my Equine Facilitated Wellness page on my website and there is so much you are saying that resonates with me. Even have the Brene Brown tedtalk in common. Brene has another one out, subsequent to the Power of Vulnerability called “Listening to Shame” where she talks about how she felt after Power of Vulnerability, here’s a link http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame.html. Carolyn, thank you for sharing what you know, what is happening in your life and asking for what you need. All of us have many nurturing roles to play and aspects of our lives to balance and I see you integrating them. Thanks for mixing work, family, financial needs and spiritual goals together in this lovely blog.
I wrote in for my website about the story of how when humans developed language and left the council of all beings that dogs, cats and horses followed them to help them return when we are ready. I believe that is what the horses are supporting in us. Bringing us back out of separation into unity again. I have been dancing my leadership at liberty and my perspective on it is as a big “hot hot cold” game where when I move into presence and connection(hot) my magnetic attraction is strong and when I move into separation(cold) even with a single thought that my horse drifts or leaves. Fabulous way to play with my consciousness and notice where I block or distance myself. Amazing to me how important distance is and how irrelevant to connection it is.

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Thea,

    I saw that TED Talk on Listening to Shame – it was great! My generation and probably yours was taught to hide vulnerability and personal interests. So, I know things are getting better because people are beginning to speak up about the robotic condition we created by not sharing our personal, authentic journey with each other. I look at my readers as extended family so of course, I would share what’s going on with my life. I also lead by example so that we can get closer connected and back to our authentic truth.

    Thank you for sharing.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

Anna Hall WREC Fall 2012 - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn
Amen to creating more horse/human connections! I, too, hated school with its restrictions and one-sidedness, however, my horses have been diligently working on me and two years ago I made an abrupt career change and now I find myself working as a teacher. 😉 I strive to use the principles you and my horses have taught me – situational leadership, flexible boundaries, open communication and love … This is how it is with the horses and I find this to be my preferred way of being. My human-ness pops up often (impatience, vulnerability) but I try to ask “Why?” and learn the lesson. It is my heart-felt wish, just as you said, to raise the vibrations of the people through the way I communicate with them and thereby give nourishment to the soul.
With love to you and your Mother,
Anna. :-)

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Anna,
    Thank you for reading my blog and leaving a comment. It really gives me energy to write another one. Situational leadership and listening to our authentic self is our greatest teacher and growth to personal transformation is our greater ability to connect with our hearts and life’s goodness.

    With love in return,
    Carolyn

UlrikeKraft - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

this is exactly what I’ve been trying to work out, since I had a baby. How can I make sure nobody ever puts him down and tells him he’s bad or he can’t do something? I really want to protect him from that!
I had a very bad time at school. I hated it from day one and promised myself to never have anything to do with school, if I can get out of it someway. I never had time to do my homework because I spent the afternoons with the horses. Being with the horses I felt invincible, but at school I was vulnerable. I woke up in the mornings with that horrible gut feeling because I knew I was in trouble for not having done my homework. But when I got out with the horses, it was like school was just a bad memory from a different life. Something lingering, unseen and forgotten. The horses saved me from having to live up to expectations. I was one of them and the human world scared me.
I don’t want my son to ever having to go through that. I found a really good little private school for him, right by a beautiful creek. He loves it so much there, he was crying when it got cancelled in the flood. They do different things each day. Monday is cooking day, then gardening day, circus day and music day. On hot days they get to swim in the creek.
My Grandmother lived through two wars and was traumatized and very fearful. As I grew older I decided not to live my life in fear and I became supergirl. I just made that decision. By daydreaming I made my dream of emigrating to Australia true. By being patient and doing what can be done in the present moment and only visiting the future or past, if it is of help in the now. And the other really important thing is to be positive. Negativity pollutes the atmosphere. That’s what I learned from the horses. But then I had a baby and that changed a lot. I gave up control in many parts of my life in order to look after the newborn and now it is hard to get it back. Also I became vulnerable again through fear for his well-being, his safety and happiness.
It is so good to have found you in this difficult time of my life. The support and guidance I get from you is beyond measure. I love reading everybody’s comments. Thank you all!

My partner is a musician and has written quite a few songs about horses. I would really like to send some of his albums to you. What address can I send them to? I think you will enjoy the music.

Ulrike

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Ulrike,

    I so empathize with you. I don’t have a child but if I did, I would have the same feelings. The school that you have your son in now I wished I would have attended when I was growing up.

    When I get my horsemanship school, I’m going to remember the curriculum and offer those types of classes in the afternoon after our meditation and horse training sessions. And then my students will have missed out on nothing.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

alssasda asdam - a couple of years ago

wow! many thanks for that incredible piece of writing. I actually beloved it towards main. Hope you keep submitting these impressive content articles

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Alssasda,
    I am so blessed that people enjoy reading by blogs. When I was a child my mother gave me a toy printing press and it amazed me that you needed to pick up one letter at a time and then place it in a holder to be able to role over a piece of paper to make one print, then it had to be delivered. After learning how a newspaper was made I still wanted to write. Then the computer came along and what magic!!

    Thank you for leaving a comment,
    Carolyn

Michele Gough - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

Your words made my heart happy. They returned to me a deep knowing within myself, as your work, and my work with horses always does. You put it so very eloquently. Sometimes it’s hard to explain truth.

I know I have found my path through the horse. It is my purpose to help bring people back to their own humanity so they can experience a strong sense of individual Self, joy and aliveness from awakening their spirit, and mostly the feeling of belonging. Connecting through our shared human values and beliefs and forming a supportive, loving, culture for the greater good. The horses teach us this. Boy, are they showing the way!

I have danced with horses and I’m forever changed. I can’t go back. All there is for me to do is continue stepping further into my life purpose and show up for myself, for the world. At times it’s scary. Can I really do it?

For the last few years I’ve been healing and becoming more wholehearted. I had to learn how to bring forth my inner strength so I could take care of myself. The horse pointed to those lost aspects of my Self and I did the work. It’s definitely an ongoing journey.

What a coincidence, I found Brene Brown’s video a few weeks ago and I’ve been thinking a lot about the power of vulnerability. I have always been vulnerable, as we all are, and for a long time viewed my vulnerability as a weakness, something to be ashamed of. That belief is changing. I am seeing it allows for an opening to heart connection. I learned this from my horse Romeo. He was shut down from years of being treated badly but through the WHR’s he started to trust again and has made himself vulnerable to me. I now see my vulnerability as a gift. People and horses feel safe with me. They are able to access their vulnerability and through that we develop intimacy and connection.

I have also learned from the horses that vulnerability needs to be balanced with inner strength so we are not taken advantage of. I love working a herd of horses. It gives me the opportunity to play with my vulnerability, my engagement, and my inner strength as I move between them. Who needs what? It’s the most exciting game. It brings me alive!

Gosh, I could talk forever on the subject of your blog. But I must stop. Thank you dear Carolyn. You are truly making a difference. I hope you can see it and take great fulfillment from it as you read these and everybody else’s words.

Michele

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Michele,
    Thank you for letting me know and my readers know what you have gained from your experience with horses and how I am supported your journey with them. I loved the cause you and I shared together in wanted to empower women and hope we get to experience this someday. Thank you for reading my blogs. It keeps us connected.

    Carolyn

      Michele Gough - a couple of years ago

      Yes. I have not forgotten our conversation. This is still a very important cause for me and one day we will get to fulfill on it. I know it. xo

Marja van Run - a couple of years ago

What an absolute GEM this blogtopic is, Carolyn! With everything I read I went like “yes, yes, yes, I agree, I agree, I agree!” I also loved the video about vulnerability and I agree with what Jannie wrote in her beautiful story, about how vulnerability makes us feel alive. Still, I also often find it very scary to show vulnerability in today’s world, because we can get hurt so easily. But it’s my mission and challenge to learn how to cope with that, because I believe in the endless power of vulnerability!

Please, keep those stories about your mom and your childhood coming, I love them. I’m happy to read that your mom is doing well, happily singing!

I feel happiness returning to me as well, now Spring is slowly arriving and swapping places with all the wintery cold. Even hearing one bird singing in the early morning makes my heart jump :-)!

Much love,
Marja

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Marja,

    I knew that you would relate to this blog from our conversations together. Schools are not built for creative artists like you and me. What runs us in every decision we make cannot happen until it’s gone through our heart.

    Much love,
    Carolyn

StephanieMorse - a couple of years ago

Hi Carolyn

sorry to hear about your mother having problems with her feet, but sounds like otherwise she is doing well. You are a good daughter.

Stephanie

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Stephanie,

    We have now fixed her feet and hopefully this will last for a while. She does have some kind of infection that is running in her body but we’ve chased it away and she is no longer in pain.

    Thank you for asking. We’ll have a video soon of what we’re doing together.

    Thank you,
    Carolyn

linda salinas - a couple of years ago

Hi Carolyn,

Another wonderful blog and I feel your heart in the message.

I think one of the reasons I like your program so much is because it supports me in where I am at in my life. Time and time again, just when I need to be reminded of something or I need to hear something, it’s seems to always be expressed in your weekly blog. I will be sad if your blog only comes out monthly. :(

I make this statement often: I have learned more about relationships from my horses then I ever did from trained professionals ( marriage counselors, psychotherapist, and yes the clergymen). I am still learning from horses and my human relationships in life are reflective of what I have learned from horses.

I use to laugh at the show The Pet Physic making fun of the people who gave the hostess Sonya Fitzpatrick all the attention and put her on a pedestal. Nothing was more ridiculous to me. I have shared the story of when my horse broke her P-2 bone, a spiral break, that was joint to joint. 2 Veterinarians and the University animal hospital all concluded to put my horse down but this beautiful mare looked at me and clearly said, “give me a chance”. I can’t tell you how hard it was for me to put her words over the advice of trained professionals but it was undeniable her message to me. I decided to give my mare a chance. I did whatever my intuition guided me to do. AFter 4 weeks, my mare appeared to be doing better so I had her re-xrayed. The report came back and said that the break was worse and there was so much separation in the bone, it would not be able to heal. Again, my mare said, “give me a chance”. What followed in the next long 8 months is enough of a saga to write a book about but in the end my mare made it and while not completely sound, she is out in the pasture living life like the rest of my horses. I learned so much about life, horses, and myself in that long 8 months. I had a knowing that I was called to be an animal communicator just like the ones I laughed at. I studied with Carol Gurney, one of the top animal communicators in the country for many years and now I work as an animal communicator. However, there was something missing in the equation between my clients and their animals. It wasn’t until I learned from you Carolyn the valuable role of leadership. So many of my clients are their dogs-horses slaves and lack the value of leadership and responsibility that comes in fulfilling their animals needs and getting the respect from their animals. What many of my clients miss, is that in becoming their animals leader they are fulfilling their animals needs setting the tone for a great relationship. Many of my clients come to me wanting me to communicate with their animals and what they have is a training issue vs. a communication issue. However with having learned your method and it’s many values, (body language) being one of them, I feel I have been successful in helping my clients regardless.

I am so honored to bring your method to our area. I am excited to teach others how to have a magical relationship with their horses. I am also excited to empower them to become fully congruent individuals by way of your method and the horse.

I look so forward to seeing you in April. I have an unquenchable thirst to learn from you. I think you are an amazing master of horses and relationships. I am so grateful to have you in my life.

Sending you love and light,

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Linda,

    I loved your post. It is an amazing story that you’ve just shared with me, similar to my blog post. You shared with me from your heart what brought you on your journey as I just shared what brought me on mine.

    I have heard this story before. I know your mare, and I cannot get enough of you telling me what took place that changed your life and led you on the path of animal communication.

    I can’t wait until you get to the ranch.

    Much love,
    Carolyn

Geerteke Kroes IC 2011 BWHRC 2011 - a couple of years ago

Checking in …

By the way Carolyn – I like the new background colour of your blogpage :-)

Warmly,
Geerteke

Elodie Belz (ICC spring 2011) - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

I am happy to read that you and your mother are doing well! What a great blog again. I totally agree with what you say about horses, that they are able to bring more interconnectedness to the world.

On another note, I could totally relate with that sentence:
“A horse can be willing and the next moment, he can be resistant and then bored or excited, distracted, aggressive, and can turn shy in an instant.”
Yesterday I was sharing territory with Sami, and he was quietly eating his hay not far from my chair. But he suddendly found that boring and became excited in a split second (he can change so quickly!). He started to run around so I stood up. When it is cold like that, he has a lot of energy, and during the last session he got to play with his buddies in the arena (see my video below). He apparently wanted to do the same and just decided to take off! He went to the gate, pushed on the wires that were not electrified, broke them and free he was!! I did not even have the time to react and send him off the gate. Of course I got really worried that he would put himself in danger, but with the help of my friend we could catch him without any drama. My friend told me that this is an old habit that he has, and that he did that a lot with his previous owner. She suggested to change the subject next time and to make him focus on work by working him in-hand on some “trail” that we would create, with wooden pallets on which he would have to clim, corridors in which he should walk and make turns, a mattress on which he should walk, etc. The idea would be that he uses his head, because he is very clever, and forgets about playing. She said it worked well in the past, and I see the value of changing the subject, but I am only half convinced/enthusiastic (partly because the habit is still there, so I think I will hit the same spot as soon as he will have high energy at liberty). I would love to hear what you would suggest! (but if you don’t have the time to respond here, we could talk about it during my follow-up private call for the Marchador level).

To finish, I would like to share with you this video of Sami playing with his buddies Cantares (the dark brown horse, who is 24 years old!) and Karlchen. It was so delightful to watch them play like that:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ICV_vQh8SY

I wish you a nice sunday,
Warmly,

Elodie

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Elodie,

    In response to your question, I think that you might put his favorite food 40 feet away from him, have a halter on him, turn him loose, send him on his way strongly, then call him back. If he comes back, he gets even better food and if he runs to the food that’s 40 feet away, drive him off of it until he is willing to come to you like in the one pile of hay game and give him that treat you have waiting for him. This way, when your horse goes to tear down the fence, you can turn him around from a sharp request from your voice and strong energy and draw him back to you by backing up. Remember to run toward him to get his attention and back up to create the draw. This exercise should fix his behavior of tearing down fences. The good news is that you get to decide how you want to approach your horse. I think it’s better to wait to give people advice until they ask for it.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

      Elodie Belz (ICC spring 2011) - a couple of years ago

      Dear Carolyn,

      Thanks so much for your answer! I like this idea because it is about getting his focus back, and I can see how it will also deepen the bond between us. It makes sense to me so I am gonna try this!

      Warmly,
      Elodie

GiselaBorawski-Hayes - a couple of years ago

Excellent! Agreed!

In having my OTTB, I have HAD to come to terms with my temperament and lack of patience. I guess if I was a horse I would have been classified as a hot blood. When one is use to being in “control” of the aspects of one’s life due to a myriad of adult responsibilities and endless errands you forget how to how to just …. BE. Also, you forget the essence of who and WHY you really are. You become a “chore chaser” and “errand runner”. I am a responsible person and like to Get Things Done. However, you can’t get a Thoroughbred done!

My OTTB, is my first horse (nothing like diving right in) and probably my last for I’m in my forties (shh!). From the start I didn’t want (okay I couldn’t) “man-handle” him like a “Mr. Aussie” I know (have you seen the videos – man my arm hurts just thinking about) and thus why I was so drawn to your course. Now, looking at the relationship between my dog and I, it is what I call a wonderful “heighten understanding” (okay I learned to speak Dogenesse) but that was only achieved without the use of tack (halter and lunge line) and by “sharing territory” (mainly the area right under my feet) and making experiences with my Labrador pooch. I wanted that with my horse. I know your rituals are right, Carolyn, because the relationship with my horse is coming into that “heighten understanding”. There’s a comfort and peace in sharing that with such a wonderful creature and all at liberty with the pursuit of happiness. Because of your ritual I am learning another language…. Horsenesse! :-) Sometimes, I get the two (prey/predator) languages mixed up and so my horse just stands there when I tell him to sit.

I’m also learning another language due to your rituals….In-Tuneness! Ironically, I homeschool my daughter using the Charlotte Mason method which is method of educational instruction that allow children to be the inquisitive beings they are by exploring their world through outdoor play, nature study, and reading non-twaddled books during their entire elementary years. Play is learning, says Charlotte! In doing so, my daughter has become a Philemon and therefore loves to research whatever catches her intrigue. She is very much in-tuned to her melodic environmental station even though I had lost how to be and everyone was just getting “static”. Experiencing my Thoroughbred has made me more childlike, along with your rituals, to be out-of-tuned with society and “things” and be more in-tuned with what matters…a relationship with the Creator and his creations.

BTW, I’m sure my OTTB wishes some horse out there would start their own ..blog.com “rituals” and teach him how to speak Humanesse! He’s having a hard time getting his human to do what he wants…(peppermints).

I love my horse!

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Gisela,

    I can see why you would like liberty work with your horse because you get it. It worked with your dog. What I like about my method is that the horse can cause his human partner to quit obsessing over what it is the horse doesn’t want to do. The Waterhole Rituals puts a mirror up to take a look at yourself right at the exact moment that something about you needs fixing, at least from the horse’s point of view. A blog would be nice – from the horse’s mouth.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

jannie smit (ic spring and summer . BWHR december 2012 - a couple of years ago

Dear Carolyn,

What a great blog!
I also loved the TED video. There are enough times in my life that I feel vulnerable. Just in day to day life or when working on some special project that I have taken on. But I have also felt very vulnerable with Mother Nature. You know I love being in nature so I will tell you a story on that one.

We lived on a property in Outback Australia (reasonable remote), approx. 40 km from a small town and our closed neighbor was 3 km away. We lived in a very old farm house with not much in it but it was a beautiful place on a river. This river did not have much water in it most of the year until one day the farmers around us told us that on 4 days time we will be flooded in. Hahaha, that is funny, we did not believe them. The river was 15 meters below the house and it was not raining, how is that possible.

Well, it did. Everyday that river came closer to the levy bank (dike) we had around the property and in 4 days time we were surrounded by water. Paddocks had become very wide rivers. It was stunning! I loved it.

If we wanted to go into town we needed to wade through water, belly deep, to a motorbike that we had put outside the levy bank on higher ground. With this bike we could go to the next river and go by boat (tinny) to the other side to our car that we parked there. From here it would take us 85 km to get into the small town over a 4 wheel drive track and going through rivers 90 cm (35 inch) deep. The normal way was cut by water.

The river kept rising and it came very close to the top of the levy bank, if it would go over we would loose all we had. Luckily we had a bulldozer from the farmer inside the levy bank and we could push up some mud on the low levels of the bank. The bank was leaking as well so we had to siphon out water to get rid of the water inside the levy bank.

We walked the bank at night every two hours to make sure that the water was not coming over. Our neighbor came by boat to check on us and to deliver bread, milk and cigarets (I still smoked than).

The horses had gone to higher ground. I found them and swam them back to inside our levy bank. The next day they were gone again as they did not like to be surrounded by water and be below the water level.

I felt very vulnerable and was unsure on what would happen next but I had also trust that everything would be ok and that we would be capable to do what ever was necessary.

In way I loved that vulnerability, it made me feel very alive and it only made me a stronger person. It made me love nature even more so.

We were on a island for 3 months as we had two floods after each other. We ended up with a Banana Split Mobile (Argo, what is a little six wheel motorbike that can go into the water) from the farmer. I have seen kangaroos swimming, we saved some goats out of tree’s, I have seen drowned cattle, we build our own hanging chair, we made a pinhole camera and took photo’s with paper negatives.

I think vulnerability is what makes us grow. There are lot’s of times that I still feel vulnerable with my horses, this used to scare me, now I see it as a part of our growing relationship.

Jannie

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Jannie,

    That is an amazing event that you experienced! You don’t have that as a problem where you are now, do you? I hope not.

    It is amazing that when times like this happen, the best part of ourselves rises up (no pun intended) to meet the challenges. You were so lucky. I’m sure glad it didn’t come into your home.

    This happens a lot in Northern California and people still continue to live on the river’s edge. They flood out every single year.

    Thank you for the story.

    Take care,
    Carolyn

      jannie smit (ic spring and summer . BWHR december 2012 - a couple of years ago

      No flooding here but we do get cyclones and that is a different story ……… maybe one day I will tell that one.

Tamara Blits - a couple of years ago

Thank you Carolyn, You are a beautiful lady, We all need help, or a little love to believe who we are. I have a hard time keeping myself going, there is so much to do. I just love the way you take care of life. you are a very strong person. I have to be strong too , with my son who is mentally disable. He is 43 yrs. old now. I have taken care of him, since he was 22. His brother kept him for a while . that gave me a life. Now I have to be strong. No one can deal with his problems. He is such a part of me. I have a very hard time. I just try to make life good. My horse is my friend. He is a leader. He is very dominant. I like the way he tries to be a leader, and gives a little. We are connected sometimes for a while. I love the way he comes to me. I also love him for doing what he wants. He always watches me. He always stays by my side. Stubborn, and good for what I ask.

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Tamara,

    It sounds like you are up to your ears in workload. If it would give you some comfort, there is a free spot in the Marchador class that has been paid for as a donation to my mother and a gift for a deserving person. Would you like it?

    You could set it up with Sharolyn. At the top of my blog, there is a tab that says contact me. If you write in and mention that I’m offering you this spot, she can set it up for you.

    Lady, I can tell you need a break and a hug.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

      Tamara Blits - a couple of years ago

      I would love to join your class. You are so kind, to offer it to me. We’ll see if I can find the time. You lifted my heart. Thank you Carolyn.

        Tamara Blits - a couple of years ago

        Life is so hard . Sometimes I can’t see . My horse and my animals Keep me alive. They are my Dreams, And I couldn’t live without them. I have worked all my life. Now retired. I bought my dream. My mustang, Dakota, My horse has given me so much. I still worry about my family. I wish someone would worry about me. I have always taken care of myself. I have taken care of my brother; and sister, who is mentally ill. I have always helped people. I just wished everyone could help themselves. My mother Died of cancer, and my father died too. I do the best I can. I believe that everything will be alright. I just keep trying. Miracles Are here , I have had a few.

Kerrie Stepnick - a couple of years ago

Carolyn, hello,

I love this post. It is quite a challenge what you do, balancing the horrible experience of an industrialized educational system with the positive approach to learning and herd health. I hope to apply the lessons.

I am sorry about dropping out of sight after talking about putting art up for auction to contribute to your Mom’s care. I still want to do that. The winter turned ferociously cold, record low temperatures that have been a torment to everyone. We could not stay in our RV on the US side because of the weather and were forced to remain across the border. Now it seems to be warming up. I hope to get back in touch with people (we have extremely limited phone and internet on the other side of the border). Don’t give up on me. I am working on some emergency provisional studio space stateside.

The horses are doing OK, the coldest weather they ever faced. Their winter coats have grown so long.

Wishing you and your Mom the best,

Kerrie

    Carolyn Resnick
    Carolyn Resnick - a couple of years ago

    Dear Kerrie,

    Thank you for staying in touch. We’re not in a hurry here about items to sell yet. We have to take a little bit of time setting the store up so don’t worry about it.

    Glad you enjoyed the post.

    Warmly,
    Carolyn

Comments are closed

Get instant access to FREE excerpts from
my best-selling book 'Naked Liberty'
Naked Liberty

To  claim your copy in PDF format, simply enter your details below and click Send It Now!

x